


Are you...jealous?

by skeleton_rose



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: College AU, Comfort, Fights, First Kiss, Jealosy, M/M, Panic, Rated teen for swearing, jeremy's feelings, jeremy's very gay for micheal ok, micheal is a sweetheart and nobody deserves him, mtn dew red, shouting, smooches, the squip is an ass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 05:04:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11867328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skeleton_rose/pseuds/skeleton_rose
Summary: Michael has a date, with someone who is not Jeremy, and it doesn't go down well.





	Are you...jealous?

Jeremy walked into their shared College dorm room, and was greeted with a sight he never thought he’d see; Michael, out of his customary red sweater, looking smart. Not ‘these jeans don’t have-holes-in-them-smart mentality that Michael usually adopted. Smart.  
He was faced slightly turned away from Jeremy, adjusting his hair in the mirror. He had his hair slicked back more so than usual, and was wearing an ironed button shirt and smart, skinny jeans. Really skinny jeans. That really suited him. That really…  
“Jeremy!” Jolted from his thoughts, Jeremy looked up to see Michael with a flustered expression and shit he was wearing contacts Jeremy couldn’t handle his cuteness when he was like that.  
“uuh,” Jeremy stuttered out, trying as hard as he could to not stutter like a total idiot. “you look…”  
“I know I probably look stupid, right?” Michael admitted, chuckling nervously as he scratched the back of his neck. No, Jeremy thought. No, you look fucking hot.  
“no no, you look,” Jeremey tried to think of the nicest compliment he could drop without revealing how flustered Michael was making him. “Real, like dapper? And smart. But not like too smart! Just uh, enough uh….” Jeremy’s thought process was trailing off as his eyes started to trace the curve of Michael’s hips, and…” uh, where are you going? Exactly? I’m not meant to come, right? Cos, I know I don’t have anything like that and…”  
Michael chuckled, not helping Jeremy’s situation in the slightest. “No dude, not unless you wanna 5th wheel, or something.”  
Jeremy’s heart stopped.  
“huh?  
“oh yeah!” Michael said, smiling bashfully, a slight flush tracing his cheeks. “Rich and Jake were moaning at me for complaining about being single, so they uh, set me up? With a guy they know. They said they’d turn up so he couldn’t like, I dunno. Become all weird, I…”  
Michael was speaking, but Jeremy couldn’t hear anything over the roaring in his ears. Michael. On a date. Michael was going on a date. And just like that the squib’s voce was there in his head, suddenly louder that his own thoughts, smirk evident in its tone “you waited too long Jeremy. I told you, his little high school crush wouldn’t stay around for you to…”  
“Jer? You okay there buddy?”  
Jeremy looked up, his heart thumping painfully in his chest. Michael looked so nice, with his hair all smart and his glasses no longer obscuring the little mole just below his right eye, and…  
“yeah of course.” Jeremy chuckled shakily. “um, just why didn’t they set me up too? I mean, I’m also single. And I complain loads…”  
Michael looked up at that. “oh, well I guess that since you and Christine broke up kinda recently, I don’t know.” He looked kinda guilty, glancing to the side just a little.  
Jeremey could feel the jealousy that was surging in his gut, because Michael looked so nice, and it was for some jackass who didn’t know Michael. “yeah, well me and Christine weren’t really going out. You know that.” It came out harsher than he expected, the hurt making his words sharper than he intended.  
Michael held up his hands in mock surrender. “okay dude. I know. Rich and Jake don’t I guess.” Michael raised his eyebrows and Jeremy could feel the mockery, hear the squip in his head saying, “you’re making a scene Jeremy. Change the subject.”  
Jeremy breathed out shakily, trying to release the tension in his chest.  
“Well…what’s he like? The guy you’re…” Jeremy could feel his mouth restrict around the words, his stomach tying in knots.  
“oh, I don’t,” Michael looked nervously to the side, a slight smile gracing his lips. Stop thinking about how kissable they are. Stop it. “I don’t really know him. I know he’s on the football team,” Michael said with a chuckle.  
Jeremy felt so bitter. “You have no right,” began the squip, and with all the thoughts swirling in his head it was hard to drown it out.  
“you okay?” Jeremy must have stayed quiet for too long; Michael was looking at him quizzically.  
“yeah,” Jeremy replied, “I just,”  
“Jeremy don’t be pathetic.” The squip snarled in warning.  
“shouldn’t you know a little bit more about him before you go?”  
Michael’s smile froze. “huh?”  
“I mean,” Jeremy knew he should stop. “What if he turns to be, I don’t know, a bad guy or something.”  
Michael’s eyes narrowed. “Dude, that’s a little unfair. Besides, like I said, Rich and Jake are coming too, to keep tabs…”  
“But what he stays nice until they like leave and he’s…like a total creep!” Jeremy stepped forward, feeling the jealous energy build and build. Stop. Stop… “Besides, you always said blind dates were stupid, and here you are…”  
“Jeremy, Jeremy whoa. Calm your ass.” Michael joked, his eyes looking nervous. He moved forward, and the close proximity made Jeremy squirm. Jeremy flinched when he felt Michaels’s hand on his shoulder. “He’s way too good for you,” the squip supplied, and Jeremy had to agree with it.  
“you sure you’re okay, bro? You’re acting tenser than that time you hid porn on my computer so your dad wouldn’t find it.” He said laughing, but his touch burned Jeremy’s shoulders. Jeremy tried not to picture Michael putting his hand on the mystery guys shoulders, but being more tender, moving his hand to his face and…  
“I’m fine!” he snapped, leaping out of Michael’s touch.  
“geez what’s got you all defensive.”  
He was worried about Jeremy, he was only worried; Michael’s eyebrows were furrowed as he said it, and the squip’s voice telling Jeremy how much he was worrying Michael only made it worse.  
“Well, you’re the one who just rubs his amazing new date in my face the minute I walk in.” Jeremy choked out, the pain constricting his throat making it harder and harder to think. “You think this is a plan, Jeremy?” the squip snarled at him. “acting whiny and needy isn’t an attractive trait, Jeremy.”  
Michael took a step back, stiffening. “You’re the one who asked me! Don’t be an asshole.”  
Yes, he knew he was the asshole. He was. He should stop while he was ahead…  
“Excuse me, you’re the asshole!” Jeremy yelled.  
“What?” Michael shouted back. “are you kidding me? How the fuck am I the asshole in this situation?”  
Jeremy really wanted to stop this, Michael looked hurt and angry, and without the glasses obstructing his face it was easier to see the anger in his eyes. But the squip was spitting insults in his ear, and he wanted him to  
“shut up!” When it echoed in his own ears he realised he said it out loud by accident.  
“Excuse me?” Michael let out a bitter laugh. “just because you’re jealous, or somt…”  
Panic ripped through Jeremy’s already fragile mind-set. “why the fuck would I be jealous! You can date whoever you want! Date the entire campus for all I fucking care!” he screamed, lungs aching. “Jeremy, what are you hoping to accomplish with this pitiful outburst?” the squip laughed, not even needing to appear for Jeremy to see the smirk that would be on its face.  
Michael said something, low and angrily, but Jeremy couldn’t hear him over the growl of the squip in his ear; he felt something brush past him and the distant sound of a door slamming shut.  
Then he was alone.  
The instant Michael was gone, Jeremy broke down.  
What the fuck did I just do.  
Everything swam, the slam of the door echoing in his head. He’d been a total asshole, and there’s no way Michael was stupid enough to not guess the correlation, between his date and…  
“aah, jealousy. The ultimate spanner in the works,” the squip said with a sly smile, as he materialized in front of Jeremy. Jeremey snapped his head up at that, because the squip never appeared, only if it got really bad.  
“shut up,” Jeremy hissed.  
The squip chuckled, and Jeremy’s blood curdled in his veins.  
“If only you’d followed my advice, Jeremy. If only…”  
“Then what!” Jeremy didn’t care if the whole campus could hear him yelling at nothing. The squip grinned at that, somewhat satisfied with Jeremy’s reaction. “Stop pining after a guy you hurt and expecting him to forgive you.”  
The image of the Halloween party flooded his brain, and the guilt started to burn through him. “He’s forgiven me for that,” he breathed out, not sounding at all certain.  
“Has he really?” The squip paced forward and stared straight into his eyes. “in his position. Would you?”  
The panic was rising in his gut, and his throat felt like it was caving in. The dark thoughts curled into his mind like smoke; the squip’s voice was all encompassing. Normal positive thinking wasn’t working. He needed, he needed…  
Mountin dew red, he thought. Mountin dew red.  
The squip’s calm demeanour vanished. “Jeremy, no. Jeremy…”  
Jeremy ran to the end of the dorm room in an instant and tore open the door of their minifridge. He could hear the squip insulting him, insulting Michael, its calm demeanour cracking as Jeremy reached for the bottle with shaking hands. At least the squip no longer had full power over his body anymore. He grabbed their nearest bottle-which they kept in times like this- and chugged it back. Instantly a white-hot pain shot through his skull and he heard the distinct sound of the squip screaming his name, and his own garbled cry of pain before he dropped the bottle to the floor and fell to his knees. It always hurt, every time.  
But the squip’s voice was gone, and that was enough.  
The silence filled the dorm room, and it was almost overwhelming in its peace. He felt hot tears cascade down his cheeks, and his chest began to heave with relief. He tried not to think about Michael, and how he was such an ass; he could feel the guilt churn into anxiety in his gut.  
Dammit dammit dammitdammit…  
“Jeremy?”  
Jeremy jerked and pulled himself up, shame washing over him. Michael was standing in the doorway, and he looked like he’d run back. Why? Jeremy didn’t deserve that. He wiped at his tears, cringing as his voice cracked saying, “Michael?”  
Michael’s eyes tracked down to the bottle of Mountin dew red lying next to him, several red drops staining the already hideous carpet. “shit.” Jeremy scrambled to grab the bottle and rub at the marks. “Sorry, m-Michael, I’m sure I can get it out…”  
“it’s fine.”  
“No it’s n-not,” Jeremy gasped out. “I’ve gotta, I’m…”  
Jeremy distantly heard the sound of slow footprints approaching him, praying to god Michael was going to punch him because…  
He felt a slight tap on his arm and looked up, seeing worry crossing Michael’s features.  
“The squip?” Jeremy didn’t know what to say so he nodded dully in response. “ I heard you shouting at nothing when I left.”  
Jeremy dropped his eyes to the floor, numbly aware of his hands shaking still. Michael took the bottle from his hands and said, “go lie down” in a voice that suggested this wasn’t an option. Jeremy staggered to the bed, wishing Michael would yell at him because he felt too guilty otherwise. He pulled himself into the bed, lying on his side and feeling his chest heave in and out unevenly. When Michael returned, he expected him to go. He didn’t. He sat down next to him, leaning back against the wall. Jeremy looked up in shock. “your d-date…” he stuttered out.  
“Cancelled it.”  
Shit  
“no, no Michael, don’t, dammit, Michael...”  
“It’s fine”, Michael mumbled in response, letting out a soft sigh. It didn’t stop Jeremy worrying though. “I didn’t really feel, up for it anyway.” Jeremy knew why. It was him. All his fault. Jeremy curled up tighter, heart thundering in his chest.  
“I wanted to talk anyway.”  
Jeremy tensed and Michael must have sensed it because he quickly blurted out a “you don’t have to, if you’re not up to it, cos I know the whole squip thing can, like mess you up for a bit.”  
Jeremy let it hang in the air before murmuring a hesitant ‘okay’.  
Michael breathed in; the panic settled in Jeremy’s entire body, feeling glad he was facing away from Michael right now.  
“about that fight.”  
“I’m so sorry Michael,” Jeremy gasped out. “I was totally out of line, I was a complete asshole, it was all my fault,”  
“that it was.” Michael said with a chuckle. “but… when I said you were jealous,” his tone switched instantly. “you acted as if I accused you of being jealous, of the guy, I was gonna go on a date with? Not the fact that I was going on a date in the first place, like…uh you” Jeremy felt his throat constrict. “uh…never mind.”  
Jeremy knew what he should say. The truth that was always sitting on his tongue, whenever Michael would get high with Jeremy and turn all giggly and cuddly and Jeremy just wanted to blurt his feelings out. Whenever the squip came back and Jeremy was shaking and his eyes were darting around the room, and whatever the situation Michael would grab hold of his hand and take him home; they’d sit on the bed, playing videogames until Jeremy’s nerves were calmed, and when Michael looked so relieved when he gave the all clear, he wanted to say it then. Say that he loved him. Say how much he needed him, and how he didn’t deserve any of this. And somehow, of all the things that he wanted to say, that’s what slipped.  
“I don’t deserve you.”  
“what?” he felt Michael twist around on the bed. “dude, no…”  
Jeremy pulled himself closer, his head feeling oddly empty without the squip mumbling at him.  
“everything about me is so terrible.” How I get jealous though I have no right, how I ruin your night because I’m a horny teen who can’t keep his emotions in check.  
“no, no” Michael scrambled for Jeremy’s shoulders, turning him around to see Michael’s face above him. “everything about you is so…” Michela breathed out shakily, his voice breaking slightly. “wonderful.”  
Jeremy pulled away. “everything about me makes me wanna die” he said, voice barely above a whisper.  
Michael crawled on top of Jeremy, turning his head upwards so he could see his face when he said, “Everything about you is so alive.”  
Jeremy hated the warm smile Michael gave him; he hated the way that warmth spread across his chest; he hated that Michael still stuck around, looking at him like he was everything.  
“Don’t look at me like that.” Jeremy grumbled, trying to stay mad when Michael’s tanned, gorgeous face was inches from his own.  
“like what?” Michael said, his eyes lit up with a hopeful smile.  
“Like I’m…I don’t know dude…” Jeremy could feel his cheeks flushing, suddenly aware of how close their chests were, and the way he could feel Michael’s breath against his lips.  
“like you love me, or something,” he murmured, his voice sounding punched out, his emotions flattening his chest.  
“but I do.”  
What.  
Jeremy’s eyes snapped up, heart hammering in his throat. Michael looked a little panicked, like he might retract his statement any time, cheeks flushed and deep, brown eyes watching Jeremy with such…  
But I do.  
Jeremy swallowed; his heart felt way too big for his chest. He felt so scared, because he didn’t deserve Michael in any way, but he wanted him. Selfishly, he wanted him. So fucking much. Michael was hovering above him, and time stood still.  
And Jeremy risked it. He broke the bubble between them by leaning up, slowly and cautiously, because what the fuck was he doing and Michael had a date tonight, with someone who is not you. He leaned up, too scared to open his eyes, and pressed his lips so lightly to Michaels they practically didn’t kiss. Their noses bumped slightly, and Jeremy pulled away almost instantly, already forgetting the warmth of Michael’s lips, how they felt.  
The moment after the kiss, Jeremy lay back, his head screaming at him; he refused to open his eyes. He knew that Michael kinda confessed to him, but he could have meant it platonically, or Jeremy made it up, or misheard him or…  
But his thoughts were silenced the minute Michael’s lips were back on his, certain this time. Deliberately pressing against his own. Every thought was filled with Michael Michael Michael and Jeremy was frozen for barely a minute, before leaning up as best as he could with Michael on top of him. The brief kisses he’d shared with Brooke and the pecks from Christine were nothing on this: not even close. Michael’s lips were warm and rough, and his hand that had sneakily crept up to frame Jeremy’s head was gentle and sure. Why didn’t he kiss him earlier?  
Michael pulled away to breath; Jeremy felt his cheeks heat up embarrassingly quickly as he took in Michael’s lidded eyes and flushed cheeks. A moment passed, and the Michael laughed. “So, you really were jealous, huh Jer?”  
Jeremy’s laughter bubbled out of his throat, giddy with shock. “Shut up” he chuckled, punching Michael playfully in his arm.  
“No” Michael said with a lopsided smirk.  
Jeremy breathed out shakily, gazing up at Michael with his giddy grin and the deep flush spreading across his cheeks. He could see the slight nerves in Michael’s eyes, the slight flash of fear. He could see how he couldn’t stop grinning, like he was incapable of stopping. Then out of nowhere the situation hit him, the fight, the…  
“Your date.”  
Michael looked confused for mere seconds, before realisation hit him and his eyes widened. “Wait, Jer…”  
It hit Jeremy all at once. How Michael couldn’t love him, not when he was going on a date with some guy, and… Jeremy pulled himself inwards, heart thumping so loudly against his chest it was all he could hear; he couldn’t hear Michael begging him to listen, and his soft voice telling him it was okay and…  
He didn’t fully snap out of it until he felt a warm hand gripping his tightly, shaking almost as much as his own. Jeremy looked up, only to see a flustered Michael staring anywhere but Jeremy’s face. Jeremy was so awestruck by Michael that he didn’t fully register that he was actually talking.  
“wait…uh…what?”  
Michael gave him a brief glare, before chuckling lowly.  
“That date was ‘cos… I couldn’t get over you.”  
A brief moment of Jeremy’s brain short-circuiting.  
“I couldn’t stop complaining about… being so hopelessly in love with you that I couldn’t stop thinking about it, about you…” Michael breathed out shakily. “it wasn’t cos I didn’t uh…cos I do.” Michael turned around to face Jeremy, and he looked gorgeous (well he always did but more so than usual). His cheeks were flushed and without his glasses he looked so vulnerable, although the worried expression was one Jeremy had to fix. Because he loved him. And Michael…  
“oh.”  
Jeremy was frozen. Until it hit him. The reality of it.  
“oh!”  
Michael laughed, his entire body shaking. “you look like you’ve cracked the fucking da Vinci code or some shit.” Jeremy looked up, a laugh bursting out of his chest before he could stop it.  
“yeah.”  
Michael grinned over at him, looking so happy that Jeremy couldn’t handle it. His heart felt like it was going to explode out of his chest. Without thinking he grabbed the front of Michael’s shirt and pulled into another kiss, but with both of them smiling so much it was almost impossible to keep it going. When they parted Michael was flashing his winning smile, and Jeremy felt it slip from his lips automatically.  
“god I love you.”  
Michael’s eyes widened. “oh.” Jeremy simply grinned, his entire chest warmer and his heart beating a mile a minute. “I love you, so much.”  
Michael’s cheeks heated up ridiculously quickly, and he had to cover his face, letting out a breathy, “okay.”  
“what you said it first.”  
Michael slapped him playfully on the shoulder; even with his face covered Jeremy could see that even the tips of his ears were pink.  
“it’s different when you say it.”  
Jeremy grabbed Michael’s hands, pulling them away from his face. “How come?”  
Michael fixed Jeremy with a lopsided grin.  
“Cos, you sound like Mickey Mouse on helium compared to my rich baritones.”  
“why you FUCKING…”  
Jeremey tackled Michael to the bed, grabbing his sides and tickling him mercilessly, revelling in Michael’s laughter as he giggled and squirmed on the bed. And if they exchanged a couple kisses in between the laughing and the play fighting, who cares.

**Author's Note:**

> whoop first bmc fic   
> I apologise is they're out of character and if the pacing is all off.  
> I hope you enjoyed- I always appreciate feedback xxx


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